Trying to be cool and miserably failing

FM called me Monday night, and we talked for 1 1/2 hours! I can't think what about, but we did. That must be a good sign and thank you to any of you (including my spirits) who lent a hand there. He is going to France to see his son but doesn't know when (has to sort out work) but wants to see me before he goes and will be in touch.........so it's now 2 days later and I haven't heard a thing. My dialling finger is twitching like a twitchy thing from the planet twitch, the butterflies are returning and I'm getting snappy.

I have come to the conclusion I am a totally insecure person and if I don't get constant reassurance I go into severe decline.Pathetic ,isn't it? It must be a hangover from being married to a total and utter c**t for so long. When I finally meet someone I like I can't believe they're going to bother. (The camera man just reinforced that too....I believe he's well overdue a chapter in here and will be on these pages shortly. Miss it at your peril).

So 2 days isn't so bad really is it, and I will just have to sit tight and hope and pray and NOT CALL. That would be pushy and desperate. (I wonder who makes up these bloody rules? Do men feel they musn't call too soon so they don't look desperate? If you are an adult in your 40's and you like someone why can't you just call them? ) I anticipated these emotions tonight and have a couple of DVD's out to keep me occupied. I should have shagged him when I had the chance.

I'll let you know if he does.(Call that is)

I heard from the Hobbit. He's been in severe financial difficulty to the extent where he nearly gave up smoking, as he couldn't afford to buy any fags! Desperate times for us all, these days! He can't take me climbing yet as he is out of practice and might drop me. (I think that's a pretty good reason actually).We will go out for a drinkie soon though.Sweet boy!